Mille Sabords
Jul 3, 2008, 1:47 PM
As a former trolley tour guide I had a belly laugh reading this one.
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Bob's hidden Ottawa
Bob Robertson
The Ottawa Citizen
Thursday, July 03, 2008
Ottawa has, mainly, two distinct groups that flood the streets of our capital: tourists and politicians. One is a noisy gaggle of loud, pointing, shouting, out-of-towners, muscling ordinary citizens off the sidewalk. The tourists often act much the same way.
Well, the season of the politician is gone from Ottawa and the season of the tourist has arrived.
If you've got visitors from out of town, you could show them the typical sights, but, today, I'm offering you something new called "Bob's Hidden Ottawa," historical sights that the Hop-on/Hop-off Bus won't take you to.
Here's a couple to get you started: "Trudeau's Walk in the Snow Route." Sure, you can cruise past 24 Sussex Drive, but Bob's Hidden Ottawa will let your footsteps follow where Pierre Trudeau took his momentous walk in the snow that culminated in his second and final resignation.
Although the former prime minister never revealed exactly where he walked that February night in 1984, Bob's Hidden Ottawa knows, although like any good tourist operator, we can't reveal our sources. Your walk begins outside the gates of 24 Sussex Drive.
First, you walk south on Sussex and then, just like Pierre Trudeau in that raging blizzard, you will turn up Stanley, along Dufferin and back home along Mackay. Where Mackay meets Sussex you will see a red fire hydrant. This is where, unbeknownst to most historians, a great snowball fight ended Trudeau's famous walk. As Pierre drew near the prime minister's residence, he came face to face with a small gang of ne'er-do-wells with nowhere to take out their rage (this was before the Bloc Québécois came into being). They challenged Canada's greatest political icon and he responded with a blistering defense of snowballs, perhaps as many as fifty solid shots all hitting their target, sending the sulking hoods back into the blizzard.
Feeling emboldened by his victory, Trudeau decided then and there to announce his resignation the next day and the rest is history.
Next stop on Bob's Hidden Ottawa tour is the very shop where Preston Manning got his make-over in 1994.
Our tour bus will let you off at a nondescript corner in colourful Hintonburg. Right across the street is an unassuming little shop called Joe's Blow Dry, run by an industrious salon owner known simply as Joe the Fixer. It may seem like just a funky little set-and-perm joint, but it was here that Preston Manning, newly arrived in Ottawa as head of the Reform Party was taken, in his desperation to rid himself of the geeky image that he was derided for.
Downstairs, Joe the Fixer himself supervised the hair transformation that took Mr. Manning, in a matter of only 30 minutes, from country crop to city slick. Upstairs, Joe's brother, One-Eyed Pete, did laser eye surgery in his spare time. The Reform leader was whisked upstairs, the wire-rimmed specs were ripped from his head and in a few blinding flashes of laser beams, Preston Manning, was overheard shouting, "I can't see! I can't see!" This is normal for laser eye surgery.
In a few weeks, Preston's "veesion" returned and he then moved on to the back of Joe the Fixer's store for some serious voice coaching, taught by Joe's cousin, Deep Throat Dino who took the Reform leader's high-pitched squawking voice down to a low-pitched squawking voice. Now, finally, a slickly dressed, finely coiffed Preston Manning was ready to lead his Reform troops into the government benches of Parliament Hill.
So, before you re-board Bob's Hidden Ottawa bus, look over at Joe's Blow Dry shop and remember the history lesson learned there: a new haircut and suit will get a Reformer elected as opposition leader, but only a divided Liberal Party will get a Reformer into the prime minister's office.
The Bob's Hidden Ottawa Tour will show you so much more: the official residence of the leader of the Green Party at the Backpackers Lodge in Old Ottawa South. We'll also show you the exact spot by the Rideau Canal where Bob Rae was baptized as a Liberal, plus we'll follow along the now infamous Maxime Bernier "Trail of Scattered Dreams," visiting the various bars and cafés where the former foreign minister left important government papers. Keep your eyes peeled. Some say there are still a few tucked under the seats.
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Bob's hidden Ottawa
Bob Robertson
The Ottawa Citizen
Thursday, July 03, 2008
Ottawa has, mainly, two distinct groups that flood the streets of our capital: tourists and politicians. One is a noisy gaggle of loud, pointing, shouting, out-of-towners, muscling ordinary citizens off the sidewalk. The tourists often act much the same way.
Well, the season of the politician is gone from Ottawa and the season of the tourist has arrived.
If you've got visitors from out of town, you could show them the typical sights, but, today, I'm offering you something new called "Bob's Hidden Ottawa," historical sights that the Hop-on/Hop-off Bus won't take you to.
Here's a couple to get you started: "Trudeau's Walk in the Snow Route." Sure, you can cruise past 24 Sussex Drive, but Bob's Hidden Ottawa will let your footsteps follow where Pierre Trudeau took his momentous walk in the snow that culminated in his second and final resignation.
Although the former prime minister never revealed exactly where he walked that February night in 1984, Bob's Hidden Ottawa knows, although like any good tourist operator, we can't reveal our sources. Your walk begins outside the gates of 24 Sussex Drive.
First, you walk south on Sussex and then, just like Pierre Trudeau in that raging blizzard, you will turn up Stanley, along Dufferin and back home along Mackay. Where Mackay meets Sussex you will see a red fire hydrant. This is where, unbeknownst to most historians, a great snowball fight ended Trudeau's famous walk. As Pierre drew near the prime minister's residence, he came face to face with a small gang of ne'er-do-wells with nowhere to take out their rage (this was before the Bloc Québécois came into being). They challenged Canada's greatest political icon and he responded with a blistering defense of snowballs, perhaps as many as fifty solid shots all hitting their target, sending the sulking hoods back into the blizzard.
Feeling emboldened by his victory, Trudeau decided then and there to announce his resignation the next day and the rest is history.
Next stop on Bob's Hidden Ottawa tour is the very shop where Preston Manning got his make-over in 1994.
Our tour bus will let you off at a nondescript corner in colourful Hintonburg. Right across the street is an unassuming little shop called Joe's Blow Dry, run by an industrious salon owner known simply as Joe the Fixer. It may seem like just a funky little set-and-perm joint, but it was here that Preston Manning, newly arrived in Ottawa as head of the Reform Party was taken, in his desperation to rid himself of the geeky image that he was derided for.
Downstairs, Joe the Fixer himself supervised the hair transformation that took Mr. Manning, in a matter of only 30 minutes, from country crop to city slick. Upstairs, Joe's brother, One-Eyed Pete, did laser eye surgery in his spare time. The Reform leader was whisked upstairs, the wire-rimmed specs were ripped from his head and in a few blinding flashes of laser beams, Preston Manning, was overheard shouting, "I can't see! I can't see!" This is normal for laser eye surgery.
In a few weeks, Preston's "veesion" returned and he then moved on to the back of Joe the Fixer's store for some serious voice coaching, taught by Joe's cousin, Deep Throat Dino who took the Reform leader's high-pitched squawking voice down to a low-pitched squawking voice. Now, finally, a slickly dressed, finely coiffed Preston Manning was ready to lead his Reform troops into the government benches of Parliament Hill.
So, before you re-board Bob's Hidden Ottawa bus, look over at Joe's Blow Dry shop and remember the history lesson learned there: a new haircut and suit will get a Reformer elected as opposition leader, but only a divided Liberal Party will get a Reformer into the prime minister's office.
The Bob's Hidden Ottawa Tour will show you so much more: the official residence of the leader of the Green Party at the Backpackers Lodge in Old Ottawa South. We'll also show you the exact spot by the Rideau Canal where Bob Rae was baptized as a Liberal, plus we'll follow along the now infamous Maxime Bernier "Trail of Scattered Dreams," visiting the various bars and cafés where the former foreign minister left important government papers. Keep your eyes peeled. Some say there are still a few tucked under the seats.