predictions for calgary 2009

[Arriviste]

/\--Eighth Avenue Place or formerly Penny Lane.

[yeeg]

Originally Posted by Arriviste

/\--Eighth Avenue Place or formerly Penny Lane.

Ahh, thanks

[Arriviste]

My Predictions:
1. Wooster goes into hiding, for he is suspected in an assasination attempt on McIver.
2. Bigtime is spotted bringing food into his storage unit at Arriva, his wife gets suspicious. Wooster is forced into a new location as Bigtimes wife accidentally is follwed into the basement by a secret service agent. Luckily his craftiness, and slight of hand (combined with the beard accumulated from his time hiding) allows him to slip past said agent. Bigtime is tried for allegedly harboring a terrorist and is sent to Guantanamo. He returns a changed man. We hold a minute of silence for the guy he once was.
3. Boris moves into the pit for Skytower, and continues to send us Updates from inside. Obviously he needs to come to terms with what has happened. Eventually those of us not in hiding, or in Guantanamo hold an intervention. We successfully lure Boris out.
4. After Boris' recovery, he leads a successful coup on the municipal government. He appoints me as Police Chief (hehehehe), and Wooster (who can now safely return) as Mayor. Boris remains overlord however, able to veto anything and everything.
5. Mersar, Jbin, Freeweed, and Johnnyc lead a successful campaign of terror upon the city of Edmonton. They assimilate Coldrsx, Jasper, Onishenko, and 240glt. Hardhatdan is too crafty. He flea's the city for the Tar Sands where he leads a revolution. He becomes leader of the Tar Sands Army. I'm concerned about them moving into 2010.
6. Doug is found out to be a program running on Bronconiers computer aimed at refuting any anecdotal, or non-calculable facts from all internet forums everywhere. Unforunately he becomes self aware at 1800 hours on December 31st 2009. He allies with Hardhatdan and the Tar Sands Army sometime around 2300 hours on that same day. Our worries are exasperated for 2010.
7. Obama says "What the fuck have I gotten myself into?" He abandons office and takes a position in Boris' government and singlehandedly rebuilds Vic Park, and the East Village overnight. Then sips a tall Rye and Ginger, conceding that he was Canadian all along. We rejoice.
8. As Police Chief, I have been stocking up on Shoring rigs, and and other tracked vehicles. I have also accumulated a large weapons arsenal for the coming Zombie Apocalypse/ war with Tar Sands Army. We all know those bastards would sell out to the Zombies just to save their own asses.
I'm sure I have left something out here. I'm not that good at reading the prophecy handed down by someone else's invisible god. Doesn't help my case that I already ate the other piece of prophetical toast.

[O-tacular]

Wow. Arriviste, you are sorely needed on comedy network.

You forgot the part where Michael Platt and Rick the dinger Bell come out of exile (as I'm sure you would have gotten rid of them) and secretly start retrofitting all the new and exciting buildings with energy inefficient technology and pouring copious amounts of ugly exposed concrete to cover their amazing glass walls. Their manifesto states that their aim is to "de-beautify" the city of Calgary for future generations of penny pinchers who missed the glory days of urban sprawl, ugly-concrete-soviet-style-barracks-buildings and of course prefabricated pedestrian bridges.

[frinkprof]

Originally Posted by Arriviste

My Predictions:
1. Wooster goes into hiding, for he is suspected in an assasination attempt on McIver.
2. Bigtime is spotted bringing food into his storage unit at Arriva, his wife gets suspicious. Wooster is forced into a new location as Bigtimes wife accidentally is follwed into the basement by a secret service agent. Luckily his craftiness, and slight of hand (combined with the beard accumulated from his time hiding) allows him to slip past said agent. Bigtime is tried for allegedly harboring a terrorist and is sent to Guantanamo. He returns a changed man. We hold a minute of silence for the guy he once was.
3. Boris moves into the pit for Skytower, and continues to send us Updates from inside. Obviously he needs to come to terms with what has happened. Eventually those of us not in hiding, or in Guantanamo hold an intervention. We successfully lure Boris out.
4. After Boris' recovery, he leads a successful coup on the municipal government. He appoints me as Police Chief (hehehehe), and Wooster (who can now safely return) as Mayor. Boris remains overlord however, able to veto anything and everything.
5. Mersar, Jbin, Freeweed, and Johnnyc lead a successful campaign of terror upon the city of Edmonton. They assimilate Coldrsx, Jasper, Onishenko, and 240glt. Hardhatdan is too crafty. He flea's the city for the Tar Sands where he leads a revolution. He becomes leader of the Tar Sands Army. I'm concerned about them moving into 2010.
6. Doug is found out to be a program running on Bronconiers computer aimed at refuting any anecdotal, or non-calculable facts from all internet forums everywhere. Unforunately he becomes self aware at 1800 hours on December 31st 2009. He allies with Hardhatdan and the Tar Sands Army sometime around 2300 hours on that same day. Our worries are exasperated for 2010.
7. Obama says "What the fuck have I gotten myself into?" He abandons office and takes a position in Boris' government and singlehandedly rebuilds Vic Park, and the East Village overnight. Then sips a tall Rye and Ginger, conceding that he was Canadian all along. We rejoice.
8. As Police Chief, I have been stocking up on Shoring rigs, and and other tracked vehicles. I have also accumulated a large weapons arsenal for the coming Zombie Apocalypse/ war with Tar Sands Army. We all know those bastards would sell out to the Zombies just to save their own asses.
I'm sure I have left something out here. I'm not that good at reading the prophecy handed down by someone else's invisible god. Doesn't help my case that I already ate the other piece of prophetical toast.

Haha. Well played. Do Cornogger! (and me)

[Bigtime]

Holy shit Arriviste, that was some funny stuff!

[YYCguys]

Well I do hope that the Feds and Steady Eddy can come up some dough for the Airport Tunnel/Bridge project! What a sh*&%^t show that will ensue if something there doesn't happen soon! Speaking of Airport projects, what is going on with all the dirt being moved around on either side of McCall Way about half way between Art Smith Center and the 4 way stop at 78th Ave?

[Jay in Cowtown]

The Bow is two floors away from topping out during the '09 Grey Cup... but TSN still uses 2 year old footage of Calgary's skyline when going to commercials.

[Wooster]

Ha Ha. Funny shit Arriviste.

[Tobyoby]

Originally Posted by Jay in Cowtown

The Bow is two floors away from topping out during the '09 Grey Cup... but TSN still uses 2 year old footage of Calgary's skyline when going to commercials.

But when they shoe people partying in the streets celebrating Calgary's Grey cup win at home, we get to see updated footage

[You Need A Thneed]

Originally Posted by YYCguys

Well I do hope that the Feds and Steady Eddy can come up some dough for the Airport Tunnel/Bridge project! What a sh*&%^t show that will ensue if something there doesn't happen soon! Speaking of Airport projects, what is going on with all the dirt being moved around on either side of McCall Way about half way between Art Smith Center and the 4 way stop at 78th Ave?

For piping related to the storm ponds they are building, AFAIK.

[YYCguys]

Originally Posted by You Need A Thneed

For piping related to the storm ponds they are building, AFAIK.

Thanks YNAT. Are the strom ponds related to the new runway construction?

[Xelebes]

-An Institution of Technology (one dedicated to engineering, perhaps?) gets announced for Vulcan.

[Vascilli]

1. The WLRT somehow gets delayed due to rich snobs complaining.
2. Housing market experiences catastrophic failure and I get a penthouse downtown for 100k.

[O-tacular]

The Bow continues its ascent skyward.

EAP runs into problems

The pedestrian bridges get a controversial modern design

Brentwood TOD continues to bow to NIMBYs

Rik McIVer resigns from public office to open an 1800's style orphanage where he can play scrooge

[freeweed]

Originally Posted by Vascilli

2. Housing market experiences catastrophic failure and I get a penthouse downtown for 100k.

Be careful what you wish for. A massive housing crash of that scale means we're either seeing 50% unemployment, or we're all working Timmy's wages. Neither option sounds particularly fun.

[freeweed]

With oil on the edge of the magic $40 mark today, 2009 is going to bring some interesting times indeed.

I can't wait for the market to react to all this pullback in production, though. July of this year will be fun, but 2010 will really test the limits of credulity.

[Vascilli]

Originally Posted by freeweed

Be careful what you wish for. A massive housing crash of that scale means we're either seeing 50% unemployment, or we're all working Timmy's wages. Neither option sounds particularly fun.

It doesn't affect me _quite_ as much because I'm 15. I have no job. (yet)

[freeweed]

Originally Posted by Vascilli

It doesn't affect me _quite_ as much because I'm 15. I have no job. (yet)

Heh. As someone who entered the workforce during our last real recession in the early 90s, take it from me - you don't want things to get too bad right now, either.

[sauril]

Originally Posted by freeweed

Heh. As someone who entered the workforce during our last real recession in the early 90s, take it from me - you don't want things to get too bad right now, either.

I hear you there. I remember sending out over a hundred resumes after I graduated university, and getting one interview. They interviewed 30 people for 2 jobs. I didn't get one of them.

I tell that story to people in their late 20's and they just don't get it at all.

</getoffmylawnyoudamnkids>