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  #101  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 8:03 PM
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I wouldn’t be a typical dad, that’s correct. Also no dad bod, dad jeans or dad jokes. No Disney vacations, movies or plastic crap. No accommodating picky eating habits, and no “family-friendly” restaurants. The pub for lunch, maybe.

But I think the average parent indulges their kids and changes their life to suit the desires of their children far too much.
"Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children.

Now, I have three children and no theories."


- John Wilmot
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Last edited by Steely Dan; Oct 24, 2019 at 8:29 PM.
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  #102  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 8:38 PM
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Another city I'd love to live in is Prague. Smack in the center of Europe, with rail connections to everywhere and an utterly gorgeous city.

Budapest would be high on the list but that seems like quite the language barrier.

Back to the dad programming. I'll just say I have no plans to have children, since I'm pretty pessimistic about the state of the world in 2100.
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Last edited by ChiSoxRox; Oct 24, 2019 at 9:13 PM.
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  #103  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 9:11 PM
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No Disney movies or movies in general? Your kids would be the weirdos who can't go to their friend's house because they might be watching Finding Nemo and serving mac and cheese from a box.
I was not as adamant as 10023 but I was one of those guys who thought he was going to inculcate my kids all of my likes (and some of my dislikes).

But there's this annoying little thing about reality - it's actually "real".

So what I find is the best you can hope for (and actually what's optimal if you want them to have a happy childhood) is to have a balance between your family's stuff and wider society's stuff.

I filled my kids' ears with classical music from the time they were babies. Today they play Lewis Capaldi, Adele, Tchaikovsky, Queen and Beethoven on the piano.

I hear the most fetid hiphop shit in the car more often than I'd like via their iPhones plugged into the Bluetooth, and then this morning one of my teens chose to pump this through the speakers, out of the blue:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uj9BihmugmI

You win some and you lose some.

My kids were eating (and behaving) in fine restaurants around the age of 18 months. They knew how to use chopsticks by the age of four or five. They would probably call the cops on us if we forced them to eat Cheez Whiz or Velveeta.

But although we never went to McDonald's as a family, as teens roaming around town with friends they eventually discovered the Golden Arches. So yeah they go there sometimes these days. But they'd never mistake that for real good food.

They watch teen-targeted schlock on Netflix but they also watched the leaders' debate during our recent election campaign. And the occasional "art house" film from Quebec or Europe.
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  #104  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 9:14 PM
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https://www.theonion.com/cool-dad-ra...-en-1819572981

this seems appropriate for this convo
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  #105  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 9:19 PM
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Originally Posted by Handro View Post
https://www.theonion.com/cool-dad-ra...-en-1819572981

this seems appropriate for this convo
LOL!

A guy I knew, before becoming a dad, would swear that his child(ren) would never ever listen to children's music. Which he felt was insufferably insipid.

Since he was really into various types of conventionally respected rock (most people who think like this usually are for some reason) I wondered what it would be like audiophonically feeding a toddler stuff like Pink Floyd or Guns n Roses...

He did become a dad at least once but we lost touch before I could find out how the planned musical guinea pigging of his child turned out.
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  #106  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 9:27 PM
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Lived in Edinburgh for 10 years - it was great, but too small. My choice of right size is Berlin without a doubt.
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  #107  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 9:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steely Dan View Post
"Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children.

Now, I have three children and no theories."


- John Wilmot
No, trust me. I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World. I don’t even want to have to endure a conversation with people who go to Disney World.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Acajack View Post
But although we never went to McDonald's as a family, as teens roaming around town with friends they eventually discovered the Golden Arches. So yeah they go there sometimes these days. But they'd never mistake that for real good food.
But who cares as long as you don’t have to join them? If as you say they’d never mistake it for good food, then they’ll also stop going themselves as long as it’s not part of their teen social milieu. Job done, they won’t be overweight adults eating McDonald’s.

You don’t have to accept that being a parent makes you out of shape, or means every vacation is centered around the kids, or means your home looks like a playroom.

Back to the topic of the thread - the idea that you can’t live in a certain place because it’s not (in your mind) as good for kids is pathetic. Especially when there are probably tens of thousands of people raising kids in the places you’re talking about.
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  #108  
Old Posted Oct 24, 2019, 9:49 PM
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No, trust me. I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World. I don’t even want to have to endure a conversation with people who go to Disney World.

You’re missing out! Especially on the kids part.
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  #109  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 12:08 AM
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Originally Posted by 10023 View Post
No, trust me. I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World. I don’t even want to have to endure a conversation with people who go to Disney World.


But who cares as long as you don’t have to join them? If as you say they’d never mistake it for good food, then they’ll also stop going themselves as long as it’s not part of their teen social milieu. Job done, they won’t be overweight adults eating McDonald’s.

You don’t have to accept that being a parent makes you out of shape, or means every vacation is centered around the kids, or means your home looks like a playroom.

Back to the topic of the thread - the idea that you can’t live in a certain place because it’s not (in your mind) as good for kids is pathetic. Especially when there are probably tens of thousands of people raising kids in the places you’re talking about.

I feel the exact same about DismalLandWorld, etc... I'd rather be hit by a bus than spend one minute in a theme park.
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  #110  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 1:11 AM
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Originally Posted by Acajack View Post
LOL!
A guy I knew, before becoming a dad, would swear that his child(ren) would never ever listen to children's music. Which he felt was insufferably insipid.
He thought his toddlers would be listening to Radiohead instead of Baby Shark? LOL. I guess he learned the hard way.

Writing this as my toddler is humming the Peppa Pig tune.
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  #111  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 1:22 AM
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He thought his toddlers would be listening to Radiohead instead of Baby Shark? LOL. I guess he learned the hard way.

Writing this as my toddler is humming the Peppa Pig tune.
It is important to let kids be kids, as your compatriot Chuck E Cheese famously said.
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  #112  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 1:23 AM
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Originally Posted by 10023 View Post
No, trust me. I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World. I don’t even want to have to endure a conversation with people who go to Disney World.


But who cares as long as you don’t have to join them? If as you say they’d never mistake it for good food, then they’ll also stop going themselves as long as it’s not part of their teen social milieu. Job done, they won’t be overweight adults eating McDonald’s.

You don’t have to accept that being a parent makes you out of shape, or means every vacation is centered around the kids, or means your home looks like a playroom.

Back to the topic of the thread - the idea that you can’t live in a certain place because it’s not (in your mind) as good for kids is pathetic. Especially when there are probably tens of thousands of people raising kids in the places you’re talking about.
You and I are probably not so different. Except I do not have a 10,000 dollar sofa.
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  #113  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 1:55 AM
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Originally Posted by 10023 View Post
No, trust me. I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World. I don’t even want to have to endure a conversation with people who go to Disney World.


But who cares as long as you don’t have to join them? If as you say they’d never mistake it for good food, then they’ll also stop going themselves as long as it’s not part of their teen social milieu. Job done, they won’t be overweight adults eating McDonald’s.

You don’t have to accept that being a parent makes you out of shape, or means every vacation is centered around the kids, or means your home looks like a playroom.

Back to the topic of the thread - the idea that you can’t live in a certain place because it’s not (in your mind) as good for kids is pathetic. Especially when there are probably tens of thousands of people raising kids in the places you’re talking about.
You realize most people have probably been to Disney World, Disneyland, or Tokyo, Hong Kong, or Paris Disney, right? At least in the US, so you are swearing to not talk to a heck of a lot of people.
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  #114  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 9:36 AM
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You and I are probably not so different. Except I do not have a 10,000 dollar sofa.
To be fair, that was for a (big) sofa and matching armchair. And they’re much more expensive now!
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  #115  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 9:52 AM
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You realize most people have probably been to Disney World, Disneyland, or Tokyo, Hong Kong, or Paris Disney, right? At least in the US, so you are swearing to not talk to a heck of a lot of people.
Yeah.

Do you remember that Seinfeld episode where they were discussing the percentage of the population that is datable? I’m with Jerry that it’s like 5%. It’s probably a similar percentage of people that I’d really be interested in talking to, but that’s still like 16 million people in the US alone.

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Last edited by 10023; Oct 25, 2019 at 10:08 AM.
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  #116  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 2:36 PM
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this is the content i crave
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  #117  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 2:46 PM
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Originally Posted by 10023 View Post
No, trust me. I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World. I don’t even want to have to endure a conversation with people who go to Disney World.
This is exactly how I feel.

I don't even want to know people who willfully go to Disney.
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  #118  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 2:49 PM
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I will literally blow my head off with a shotgun before setting foot in Disney World.
yikes, let's hope it doesn't come to that.

but disney world is irrelevant. if you don't want to take your kids to disney world, then don't take them to disney world. that has absolutely zero bearing on your ability to be a good parent.

my comment about you seeming like you might not be a good parent candidate is based on the self-centeredness that comes through on a lot of your posts. you want to do whatever you want to do, with whom you want to do it, whenever you want to to do it, wherever you want to do it. whatever is going on, it's all about you and your wants.

as someone who formerly subscribed to that lifestyle, i'm telling you that it will be turned on its head if you ever become a parent and dedicate yourself to doing a good job of it. children absolutely place demands on your time, energy, and finances that will force compromises in some aspects of your life and what you want to do. they are exceptionally good at utterly obliterating the best laid plans.




Quote:
Originally Posted by 10023 View Post
Back to the topic of the thread - the idea that you can’t live in a certain place because it’s not (in your mind) as good for kids is pathetic.
that's 100% true. children can be raised (and actually are raised) anywhere, from midtown manhattan to the isolated wilderness of northern alaska, and everywhere in between.

that said, it's not realistic for every single person to raise a family anywhere on the surface of this planet. many are restricted by finances, family bonds, life situation, personal desires, etc. that's what centropolis meant with his initial comment that started this whole tangent.

could i raise my children anywhere? possibly.

but do i want to raise my children anywhere? no.

unlike most on this forum, i am FAR more oriented to familial relationships than to other aspects of life like climate, or culture, or topography, or food, or what have you. so for me, raising my kids in a place where they can form close intimate bonds with their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins is paramount. i place that above all other considerations. so while i technically could raise my kids in bulgaria or australia or tanzania or colombia, realistically that's not in the cards for me because it goes against one of my deepest core values.

other people are different and place more value on their children living in a foreign land than in staying near family, and that's perfectly fine too. those are the people who go globe-trotting about with their kids in tow. more power to them. there's no right or wrong way to do it. it's all about making choices based upon what you value, because it's impossible to have everything.
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Last edited by Steely Dan; Oct 25, 2019 at 3:47 PM.
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  #119  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 2:55 PM
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Somewhere out there is a forum with someone saying they would rather blow their head off than have to deal with people who debate the relative urbanity of two different places for the 18th time.

I feel like I could have a drink and get along with either.
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  #120  
Old Posted Oct 25, 2019, 3:39 PM
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Somewhere out there is a forum with someone saying they would rather blow their head off than have to deal with people who debate the relative urbanity of two different places for the 18th time.

I feel like I could have a drink and get along with either.
I can understand not wanting to go to Disney yourself... But I can't imagine that someone who won't talk to a person just because they went to Disney World would be a very fun person to be around.

One person's exotic destination is just another person's Disney World, so no need to shit on others vacation preferences. People from some parts of the globe will dream of going to a place like Cancun, which is not a place I'd ever voluntarily go for vacation, but turn their nose up at the idea of vacationing in Ibiza. One of the cheesiest places I've ever been in my life is Dubrovnik, Croatia. It was beautiful though.
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